| 1. Never assume that you are
invited to a ritual or a nonpublic gathering just because your friend is invited. Have
your friend call the group doing the event and ASK! (or call yourself). 2. When participating in a ritual led by a
group of which you are not a member, ask ahead of time what will be done. Should there be
something in the explanation, or in the set-up of the ritual area which bothers you, just
quietly don't participate in the ritual.
3. Ask the person(s) officiating at
a ritual before you place anything in the ritual area; wear clothing or tools which might
be considered unusual; or add private energy workings to the ritual being done.
4. Never just walk out of a cast
ritual circle. Ask someone in the group sponsoring the ritual to cut you a door if your
really and truly absolutely have to leave.
5. Don't make comments on the
ritual, its leaders or the amount or quality of the energy raised during the ritual unless
such opinions are asked for by the leaders. Save it for your friends, privately, after the
ritual is over.
6. Vegetarians, Vegans, Strict
Carnivores, Diabetics, and any others with very strong food preferences: no one minds your
asking quietly and politely "Which dishes have meat (sugar, spices, hot pepper, etc.)
in them?" When planning a meal for mixed Pagan/Wiccan groups, it is strongly
suggested that at least some of the dishes be vegetarian, sugar-free, relatively non-spicy
etc. At all times, within and without the ritual context, always provide an alternative to
alcoholic beverages.
7. While many people have become
far less secretive about their membership in a Pagan group, it is never, EVER, permissible
to "blow someone's cover". Do not ever call a friend or acquaintance by their
Pagan name or mention their membership in a mundane situation. It is also bad manners -
and a symptom of social climbing - to call an individual by his/her mundane name in a
Pagan situation. It always reminds me of an extra calling John Wayne "The Duke"
at a local bar.
8. Whether you drink, take drugs or
indulge in other similar behavior is completely your own business. It is always wrong to
urge such behavior on any other individual. The majority of serious Pagan groups
absolutely do NOT allow anyone under the influence of drugs or alcohol to participate in
ritual. Do not be offended of you are turned away for this reason. If you are taking a
psycho-active drug for a medical reason it is very wise to check with the ritual elder(s)
so they will understand and can advise you if they feel the ritual might be harmful to
you.
9. Just because most Pagans/Wiccans
are under 40 and in reasonably good physical condition, never assume that everyone is.
Rituals and gatherings should be planned so that those with physical problems are not
barred totally from participation. Particularly in ritual, be aware that many more people
than you might think are "mobility disabled." Group ritual should take place in
an accessible area and some thought should be given to designating a safe place for those
not taking part in dancing to stand or sit. Please be alert to anyone to whom help would
be welcome. Help them to find a campsite which minimizes walking - to the ritual area, to
the privies, to the eating area - whatever. Help them pitch their camp. Don't make them
feel unwelcome - most handicapped people have worked extra hard on their magickal skills
and may be able to add a great deal to the power in ritual and to the success of the
gathering.
10. When at any sort of gathering,
please be thoughtful. Particularly please observe true quiet after midnight. No one minds
if you and others want to stay up all night talking or whatever. Everyone else minds a
great deal if you stay up talking and laughing loudly and/or drumming. Those hosting a
gathering should take the responsibility of keeping the noise level very low in at least
some of the sleeping areas - and designating it as a quiet area.
11. Do not allow yourself to get
the idea that you know the One True, Right and Only Path! Even if you really do have the
conviction that what someone else is doing is "wrong", "incorrect",
"Left-hand path" or whatever, just don't talk about it. It is perfectly
permissible to refrain from participating in the activities of those with whom you cannot
feel comfortable. It is not acceptable to express the idea that they "shouldn't"
be doing it. This is not to say that if you know of criminal behavior on the part of a
so-called Pagan/Wiccan group you should not report it. We must also be responsible for
cleaning up our own act.
Paganism is glorified by its
diversity. Please do not allow yourself to express judgment by categories. Whether or not
you like or dislike blacks, Indians, Homosexuals, women, men, or whatever, keep it to
yourself! If you really and truly cannot feel comfortable taking part in a ritual which
isn't conducted according to the tradition you follow or if you cannot be pleasant in
company mixed with groups you disapprove of, please just stay home. |